In Manhattan Beach, Brooklyn just a block away from my grandmother's house there is a huge billboard with an enormous wet sewer rat in the background and a seagull next to it. The board reads "Feeding seagulls is like breeding rats."

My grandmother has a fit every time we pass the board because she thinks it is disgusting. She is also crazy and loves to feed every living thing including homeless people. I think the billboard is effective in it's ugliness. I certainly won't be feeding the birds.

My grandmother breeds homeless people by giving them great leftover food as she hands my leftover half of perfectly aged and marbled beef tenderloin and garlic mashed potatoes from Dylan Prime steakhouse to a homeless man rolling on ecstasy.